NFL Team Mottos 2007

Now that the NFL season is readying to start, we can announce the new NFL team slogans for the 2007 season:

AFC East
New England: That’s all I have to say.
Miami: How’s the arm feel, Dan?
Buffalo: Help wanted: inquire within
NY Jets: So much more than just a dick in a green hard hat

AFC North
Cincinnati: There’s no “I” in team. But there is one in “guilty.”
Pittsburgh: Twice as mobile as the clock in London and almost as smart.
Baltimore: You think Justice Roberts is impressive? Ray Lewis has seizures and plays football at the same time!!
Cleveland: @*#& rookies

AFC South
Indianapolis: What was that about Defense winning championships again?
Jacksonville: Straining against the shackles of mediocrity
Tennessee: Now that Pacman’s gone, things can only get better
Houston: Instructions to maximize enjoyment of Texans football: Cover eyes, drink heavily. Repeat as necessary.

AFC West
Denver: We don’t want to cripple anybody; we just want to knock them out for the rest of the season.
Kansas City: No fair! We haven’t played defense for years, and we didn’t win a super bowl!
San Diego: If at first you don’t succeed, try again. After that fire the coach.
Oakland: If Kiffin doesn't work out, we're making a run at luring Hayden Fox out of Minnesota.

NFC East
NY Giants: All these years we’ve been employing the less-aggressive Strahan
Washington: Setting the standard for megalomaniacal owners
Dallas: Come for the game, stay for the angry bickering that is sure to follow
Philadelphia: There’s a fine line between freak injury and breaking down. Anybody know which side of that line McNabb is on? Anybody?

NFC North
Chicago: Our motto was intercepted by another team, just like 42% of our pass attempts.
Green Bay: Did you know that in Scandinavian “Brett Favre” means “Obstacle to Progress”?
Minnesota: Without naked hooker boat parties, we’re hardly worth mentioning
Detroit: Finally ready for the 10-wideout offense we’ve been dreaming of

NFC South
Tampa Bay: Will gladly trade coach for draft picks
Carolina: Ready to choke away another season
Atlanta: Willing to donate anything to PETA to make it all just go away
New Orleans: How many years do we have to wait to move to San Antonio not to look like heartless bastards?

NFC West
Seattle: Now entering our second season of bitterness about Super Bowl XL
St. Louis: We were good once, and young. Now, not so much.
Arizona: We might suck, but at least our coach has freak-outs from time to time.
San Francisco: Working hard to ensure another year of Seattle dominance.