Friday, March 28, 2008

Jimmy Carter to Monitor Democratic Convention

Former US President Jimmy Carter announced today that The Carter Center will monitor the upcoming US Democratic Convention in Denver to ensure that it “conforms to all international standards of transparency and fairness.”

Cater said in a statement that “In addition to increasingly racist and misogynistic statements coming from the two candidates, it’s clear that there’s a pattern of intimidation and false accusation against the actual voters in the election, the so-called Superdelegates. An outside party, probably the Republicans led by sinister warlord John McCain, is seeking to unduly influence selection of the Democratic candidate for president.”

Particularly disturbing for Carter is the recent indictment of several Philadelphia and Puerto Rican superdelegates on what Carter says are “vastly conflated charges of wrongdoing.”

Carter said the move was particularly necessary in light of a rash of bribery and sex scandals against other superdelegates. “After the catastrophic elections in 2000 and 2004, America cannot afford to have another president chosen by smoky back-room deals,” Carter said. “Whoever gets the Democratic nomination will likely win the presidency, because George Bush has driven the country to ruin at the behest of his Israeli masters.”

Carter added that “as a single-term president, I am available to fill a second term as a sort of unity candidate able to promote peace and healing, and my credentials do include a Nobel Peace Prize and several other humanitarian awards.”

1 comment:

Steve Burri said...

My suggestion was:

The selection dilemma has been solved. The Democrats have unanimously agreed to take the problem to the United Nations Human Rights Council and will abide by their wise decision.

"We will get justice from Angola and Egypt. That's for sure. And our stature among the international community will be restored as well."

Flip ya fer it!