Wednesday, June 20, 2007

I Prefer ‘Link Trollop’

My brother pointed me to this blog, Ace of Spades HQ. Now, I hesitate to link to this blog for two reasons:

1) It’s funny, so I’m afraid that you’ll go away and not come back. Given that he’s enormously more popular than I am, though, that seems like scant risk.
2) There’s lots and lots of bad language (doesn’t bother me, but might bother you)

I was going to just stick Ace’s blog onto my blogroll and be done with it, but instead I’ve decided to try a little experiment. Ace identifies himself as a “link whore”, so I’m going to link to give him a couple links:

Hot homosexual donkey love in South America.
About which D&D characters various democrats would play (from 2004)

Should Ace arrive and read this far, here are a couple of posts of mine he might enjoy:

Life Cycle of Junk Science


Unified Conspiracy Theory

Seussanetics

I’m obviously hoping to score a link from Ace’s blog, or (dare I dream?) a place in his links section. Should that happen, I’ll of course stick Ace of Spades HQ in my blogroll and be happy. That would be a victory for both Ace and Plebian.

If Ace reads this, thinks I’m lame, and then insults me publicly I’ll still get more traffic and come out a winner. This would confirm the old adage “always piss upwards.” So we’ll call that scenario an outright victory for Plebian.

If Ace chooses to ignore me, I’ll begin a campaign of unbelievable bitterness and fury until he stoops to attack me or someone else notices and comments on it, thus driving my traffic up and achieving my primary goal. So we’ll call this scenario an outright victory for Plebian as well, although somewhat Pyrrhic by nature.

I really don’t see any scenario under which I can lose here, so I’m going to take a shot.

And kudos to anyone who managed to read all the way down here to the last sentence and make it through my tortured logic. Like so much of what I do, this post was probably not interesting to anybody but me.