Bush Says Mission Accomplished

In a White House press conference today US President Bush declared “Mission Accomplished” on one of his primary goals after the 2004 elections.

“When I survey the wreckage of the Republican Party today, and its dismal chance for success in the 2008 elections, I just sit back and think about how well I’ve spent the political capital I built up when I beat whats-his-name, that long-faced dork from Massachusetts,” Bush said.

Bush went on to say that “just like the supbrime crisis, some people will say I spent a little too much of my capital and went bankrupt, but I’m not worried. I figure a bailout is coming any day now.”