Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Darwin Award, Arctic Edition

[UPDATE: This is actually based on an erroneous story. Too bad, because if this were true I'd stand by my ridicule 100%. I can't, though. See explanation here.]

For centuries men have sought to traverse the Arctic sea and find the fabled “Northern Passage” that runs above Asia, North America, and Europe. For centuries these foolish men have died a gruesome, icy death.

Now it’s Adrian Flanagan’s turn, the moron-turned-yachtsman who is currently trapped in the ice above Russia. He’s hoping the Russians will use a nuclear-powered icebreaker to help him get through.

I guess he figured that because of all the global warming he’d just have to thread his way through polar bear corpses and he’d make it no sweat. I figure this fool is wearing Bermuda shorts and a tank top as he tries this attempt.

Wanna know what the best part is? His manager is handling communication and logistics for him, and presumably negotiating with the Russians as well. Her name is Louise Flanagan, and she’s his ex-wife.

I hope his divorce was amicable. Otherwise she’s probably on the phone with the Russians right now, telling them about the would-be assassin who is coming down from the North Pole to get Vladimir Putin.

(H/T Don Surber, who I really need to put in my links)