Scientists: is there anything they can't do?

It's a miracle: scientists in South Korea have finally cloned glow-in-the-dark cats!

Sensible cat owners have known for years that they take a risk every night of their cat slashing out their jugular and then laughing as their owner expires, drowned by their own femoral blood. But with a glow-in-the-dark cat, that fear is completely eliminated: now you see the vile feline as it creeps up on you and you have time to retrieve your gun under the pillow and put six or seven rounds into it.

It also totally negates a cat's ability (and, indeed, predilection) to try to trip you in the dark during power outages to make you fall downstairs and break open your head, thus allowing it to feast on the goo inside. Now you can just kick the cat out of the way, as God intended!

Advantage: Man!