Anti-GMA groups are concerned about a Swedish plan to construct a 148-foot tall moose statue filled with bars, restaurants, and a convention center. Calling the plan “Pasiphaean Folly” they protested outside a zoning commission meeting in Vasterbotten today and demanded a halt to the project.
“It’s irresponsible and foolish to build a giant sex toy for frustrated monsters here in Sweden,” said Lars Bootemlud. “I could imagine the US doing something like this, but we Swedes should know better.”
Critics say that the moose’s incredibly detailed hind end will prove irresistible for monsters as they navigate the North Sea, a popular route for giant monsters traveling between the irradiated Siberian Plains of Russia and the Atlantic Ocean, where they prey on commercial fishing boats.
“You can’t expect them not to stop by and expect to get a little action,” said GMA expert Sven Jungersund. “It’s like those porno billboards around puritan counties: it just draws every pervert for miles around in. And when they find out the moose is fake, there’s going to be some really irate monsters prowling around Sweden. Well, except Megalon; he’s grateful for any kind of action.”
“I don’t even know what a Pasiphaean Folly would be,” said project head Gorbem Moosterbooten. “The fact is everybody likes moose, so we’re going to build a giant one as a tourist attraction in the middle of nowhere. You can’t stop progress.”
Authorities recommended avoiding Sweden in the near future as a tourist destination, and advised those living their to consider moving away before the project is completed in 2009.
(H/T my hero Ed Driscoll)